South Korean Culture and Etiquette: Customs, Manners and Taboos

Korea is often called the most Confucian society in East Asia, and you can see it in daily life. Relationships are ordered by age, seniority and role, and the language itself changes with them: Koreans speak to elders and strangers in polite forms ending in “-yo” or “-nida” and drop to casual speech only with close friends of the same age or younger. That is why people you meet may ask your age or birth year soon after your name. It is not rude; it tells them how to address you.

In 2023 South Korea officially switched to international age counting, ending the old system in which everyone turned one year older on New Year’s Day, but socially people still group themselves by birth year. Older men are called “ajeossi”, older women “ajumma”, and friends or colleagues use family terms such as “oppa”, “eonni”, “hyung” and “noona”. As a visitor, “seonsaengnim” (teacher) or simply “jeogiyo” (excuse me) gets attention politely.

Face and harmony matter too. Koreans avoid open confrontation, especially with seniors, and public criticism embarrasses everyone present. Raise a complaint calmly and privately, and accept that “it is difficult” usually means no. Hard work and speed (the famous “ppalli ppalli”, hurry hurry) shape service: food arrives fast, deliveries come in minutes, and queues move quickly, so be ready when it is your turn.

Roughly half of South Koreans say they have no religion. Of those who do, Protestant Christians are the largest group, followed by Buddhists and Catholics, and churches with neon red crosses are as common a sight in Seoul at night as temples are in the mountains. Seoul’s Myeongdong Cathedral is the Catholic heart of the country, and Yoido Full Gospel Church is one of the largest Protestant congregations in the world. The Seoul Central Mosque in Itaewon serves the small Muslim community and nearby halal restaurants.

Buddhism shapes the landscape more than daily life. The main temples belong to the Jogye Order and sit in mountain valleys: Bulguksa and the Seokguram grotto above Gyeongju, Haeinsa with its Tripitaka Koreana woodblocks, Songgwangsa, Beomeosa in Busan and Woljeongsa in Odaesan. In Seoul, Jogyesa in Insadong is the order’s headquarters and the easiest temple to drop into. Inside a temple, walk around the main hall, enter through the side doors (the central door is for monks), take your shoes off before stepping onto the floor, keep voices low, and never touch statues or ring bells. Photography inside halls is often banned; look for signs.

Underneath both runs shamanism, or musok. Mudang shamans, usually women, still perform gut ceremonies for luck, health and the dead, and many families consult fortune-tellers before weddings and business openings. You can see a shrine at Guksadang on the slopes of Inwangsan in Seoul, where ceremonies sometimes take place; watch quietly from a distance and do not photograph without asking.

A short nod or a bow from the waist of about 15 degrees with “annyeonghaseyo” is the normal greeting; a deeper bow is for elders and formal moments. Men often shake hands, sometimes with a slight bow and the left hand supporting the right forearm. Hugging and kissing in greeting are not usual, and touching someone older on the head or shoulder is overly familiar.

At the table, wait for the eldest to lift their spoon before you start, and do not leave before they finish. Rice and soup are eaten with a spoon and the rice bowl stays on the table rather than being lifted to the mouth. Never stand chopsticks upright in rice, which resembles the incense at ancestral rites, and do not blow your nose at the table. Side dishes (banchan) are shared and refilled for free; just ask “banchan deo juseyo”.

Writing someone’s name in red ink is traditionally associated with death and best avoided. The number four (sa) sounds like the word for death, so some lifts label the fourth floor “F”. Personal space on the subway is limited and pushing in crowds is not personal, but queues are respected at bus stops, taxi ranks and platforms. Smoking on streets is restricted to designated areas in Seoul and other cities, and fines apply.

Drinking is central to Korean social life, from soju and beer with grilled pork to makgeolli rice wine with savoury pancakes on rainy days. The rules come from the same respect for age:

• Pouring: Never pour your own drink. Watch the glasses around you and refill them when they are empty, holding the bottle with two hands (or your right hand with the left supporting it) when you pour for someone older.
• Receiving: Hold your glass with two hands when an elder pours for you, and accept at least the first drink.
• Drinking: Turn your head away from the senior person when you sip, especially on the first glass.
• Toasting: “Geonbae” means cheers. Clink with your glass slightly lower than the elder’s.
• Declining: Leave your glass full to stop refills. Saying you are on medication or driving is accepted without argument.

A night out often moves through rounds (cha): dinner, then a bar, then noraebang (karaoke). Whoever invited, or the senior person, usually pays; offering to cover the second round is a good gesture. Public drunkenness is tolerated more than in most countries, but drink-driving limits are strict and enforced.

A Templestay is the best way to understand Korean Buddhism. More than 140 temples run programmes for visitors, booked through the Jogye Order’s official Templestay site. A typical overnight starts mid-afternoon: you change into loose temple clothes, learn how to bow and walk, join evening chanting, eat a vegetarian dinner, sleep on a floor mattress, and rise for a 03:30 or 04:00 service before the 108 prostrations, meditation, tea with a monk and the formal silent meal called baru gongyang. Expect around 50,000-100,000 won (US$35-70) a night including meals; day programmes in Seoul are cheaper.

Good choices for foreigners include Jogyesa and Myogaksa in Seoul, Bongeunsa in Gangnam, Golgulsa near Gyeongju for sunmudo martial arts, Haeinsa, Beomeosa, Woljeongsa in the Odaesan forest and Songgwangsa near Suncheon. Rules are simple: no alcohol or meat, modest behaviour, finish every grain of food you take, and follow the schedule.

Renting a hanbok has become one of Seoul’s most popular activities, and Korean visitors do it as much as foreigners. Shops around Gyeongbokgung, Bukchon and Jeonju’s hanok village rent outfits for about 15,000-30,000 won for two to four hours, including hair accessories, and wearing one gets you free entry to the royal palaces and Jongmyo. Wear it with confidence; locals see it as appreciation, not appropriation. Gyeongbokgung is closed on Tuesdays, and Changdeokgung and Deoksugung on Mondays, and the royal guard changing ceremony takes place at Gwanghwamun at 10:00 and 14:00.

Hallyu, the Korean wave, is the other reason many people come. K-pop fans can sit in on weekly TV music show recordings (KBS Music Bank on Fridays, MBC Show! Music Core on Saturdays, SBS Inkigayo on Sundays), though seats usually go to fan-club members, and agency buildings and stores in Seongsu, Hongdae and Gangnam draw fans daily. K-drama fans can follow filming locations from Bukchon to Nami Island and Busan’s Gamcheon. Treat residential locations, especially Bukchon Hanok Village, as people’s homes: since 2025 tourists may enter the core lanes of Bukchon only between 10:00 and 17:00.

A jjimjilbang is a 24-hour bathhouse with hot pools, saunas, sleeping rooms, snack bars and a TV lounge, and it costs around 10,000-20,000 won (US$7-15) to enter. Families spend weekends in them and travellers use them as a cheap place to sleep. The rules:

• Pay and change: You get a locker key, towel and a T-shirt and shorts uniform. Shoes go in a locker at the entrance.
• Wash first: The bath area is single-sex and fully nude. Shower thoroughly with soap at the seated stations before you get in a pool.
• No towels in the water: Keep your small towel on your head or on the side, and tie long hair up.
• Common areas are mixed: Wear the uniform in the saunas and lounges, which are for both sexes.
• Scrubs: The famous “seshin” body scrub by an attendant costs around 20,000-30,000 won and removes a startling amount of skin.
• Tattoos: Generally less of an issue than in Japan, though some places post no-tattoo signs; small ones are rarely noticed.
• Sleeping: Lie on the mats in the sleeping rooms, keep valuables in the locker, and expect snoring.

The family year turns on Seollal (Lunar New Year) and Chuseok (harvest festival), when families gather in hometowns, perform charye rites for ancestors and eat tteokguk rice-cake soup or songpyeon half-moon rice cakes; see our best time to visit page for dates and closures. Public festivals worth planning around include the Lotus Lantern Festival in Seoul before Buddha’s Birthday, the Jongmyo Daeje royal rite on the first Sunday of May, Gangneung Danoje in June and the Andong Mask Dance Festival in late September, when Hahoe’s masked dance drama is performed near Andong.

For traditional performance, the National Gugak Center in Seoul stages court music, dance and pansori (narrative singing) most weekends at modest prices, and the long-running Nanta show turns samulnori drumming into kitchen comedy. Folk villages such as Hahoe and the Korean Folk Village near Suwon show farmers’ music and tightrope walking. For crafts, Insadong in Seoul sells hanji paper, celadon and calligraphy brushes, while Jeonju is known for hanji and fans.

• Politics and history: Avoid joking about North Korea, the Japanese colonial period or the Dokdo islands, and call the sea between Korea and Japan the East Sea. Foreigners may not take part in political activity, including protests.
• Drugs: Penalties are severe, and cannabis use abroad can be prosecuted if it shows in a test in Korea.
• Photos: Ask before photographing people, monks and shamans. Covert filming is a serious offence, and phone cameras are designed to make a shutter sound.
• Jaywalking and littering: Both are fined. Public bins are rare; carry rubbish to a convenience store or your hotel, where it is sorted.
• Seats: Leave the pink pregnancy seats and the seniors’ seats at the end of each subway carriage free, even when the train is full.
• Tipping and haggling: No tipping. Bargaining is normal only at traditional markets and street stalls, and even there it is gentle.
• Gifts: Give and receive with two hands; the recipient often opens it later, not in front of you.

Hangeul, the Korean alphabet, takes an afternoon to learn and makes menus and signs readable. These phrases are polite enough for any situation:

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